My dad always told me “if you want to keep getting what you’re getting, keep doing what you’re doing.”
The good news is that many parents settle their disputes PRIOR to walking into a court of law. The sad fact is that these parents chose to use HIGH CONFLICT approach to get them there.
Parents did not choose high conflict, it chose them. Parents are not provided of their options. They are told to hire the meanest, baddest attorney they can find. Parents choose higher conflict because of fear, and little else.
Collaborative or team based approaches to family law cases removes that fear and allows parents to work through their problems. Collaborative or team based approaches give the parents the BEST tools to live life AFTER divorce.
You have a choice in the manner by which you resolve your divorce. Your choice may significantly define not only your quality of life but your child’s as well.
Think of the divorce as well a journey, a process, a transition. Remember you will soon be interacting with your ex AFTER your divorce your child’s other parent.
A high conflict divorce will not end simply because you get divorced. Your conflict will continue when you talk on the telephone with one another and when you see each other at your child’s school.
So if there is another way to get your divorce handled, you need to carefully consider your options.
Many parents are better served by talking to both attorneys and mental health professionals to come up with SOLUTIONS to the problems that confront you in your divorce.
The costs of not getting this right are too high to bear. Your anger, your conflict will not just affect you, it will affect your children.